How do I become my best ally?

STRONG BACK:

1. Clear Boundaries: I know what my non-negociable principles are and I respect them in all circumstances. I’m internally referenced.

2. Clarity: In my values, what feels aligned and within my integrity.

3. Responsable: For my own well being, joy and engagement with myself and others.

4. Transparent: About what I believe and stand for. My thoughts, feelings and actions are one.

5. Communicate clearly: I ask for what I want and need. I don’t expect others to anticipate my needs.

6. I have my own back: My internal self talk is loving, empathic, understanding and kind. I know how to neutralize my inner critic and grow from short comings in a positive way.

SOFT FRONT:

1. Be willing to be wrong ~ acknowledge your blindspots.

2. Curiosity ~ learn something new about an issue or a person you think you know well.

3. Vulnerability ~ be honest, say how you feel

4. Be willing to feel uncomfortable ~ have the tough conversations.

5. Opening to the mystery ~ remember, there is so much you don’t know that you don’t know.

With what topic or person are you willing to have a soft front?

Wild Heart:

1. Having courage to stand in your truth and reinvent yourself. Even if it means standing alone or challenging the beliefs of your tribe.

2. Being open to criticism and find the resilience to keep moving forward.

3. Being open to feeling everything: the easy feelings and the challenging feelings. Allowing ALL of life instead of numbing or disconnecting. 

f you are curious about any of these aspects and would like to expand them in your life you can book and individual session with anyone in our Innerland Team (here) or join us in September at our events to learn more deeply about these topics: Events

Five Aspects of Spirit of Inquiry

The Spirit of Inquiry is the force within that propels us into discovering new ways of thinking and being in the world. It has five aspects. Here they are:

1. The willigness to be mistaken about our views of world, others and self.

Inquiring on our hard wired beliefs is a tremendous door to freedom. To start the journey it helps to make an obstacle inventory of what we think gets in the way. There are three kinds of obstacles:

Internal Obstacles: Example: I don’t know what to do with all this free time

External Obstacles: Example: Being with the same people in such close proximity is hard

Big Picture Obstacles: Example: The world economy will not recover from this.

How would it benefit you to be willing to be mistaken about your views?

2. The invitation to experiend genuine curiosity.

To be curious implies leaning into not knowing.

It’s medicine for the soul to become genuinely curious about what we don’t know.

What aspect of yourself, of others, and the world, are you genuinely curious about and willing to look closer into?

3. To be vulnerable. Being willing to step into the unknown and feel all the feelings that arise with our full presence.

Opening to vulnerability can be hard. Specially if we’ve been used to running from our feelings with all kind of distractions.

What feelings do you usually feel intensely that are hard?

Can you be curious and stay with the feeling until you see what is waiting at the other side of the discomfort?

4. Develop tolerance towards discomfort.

Learning to stay in the fire of our discomfort is one of the most important practices we can learn. I’ve learnt that staying vs escaping or evading allows for what is at the other side to truly show me what I need to pay attention to. It shows me what I need to learn and where I need to grow. For example, do you experience any resistance looking at the videos of abuse and hope that the #blacklivesmatter movement are bringing to our attention?

Let’s open and breathe the pain of what is being shown to us. Let’s not turn away. Let’s CONNECT with this moment with full presence. Let's FEEL all the feelings that arise. Let’s QUESTION the old beliefs. Let’s DISSOLVE the identities that keep us apart. Let’s LIVE from the new invitation that this pause form COVID and this movement is inviting us to. The only way out is through.

If you gave words to your discomfort what would it say?
Can you listen without pushing it away?
Can you give it all the time it needs?

When the most wounded and hurt parts of ourselves and the people around us are not getting our attention we can’t learn, heal and grow.

5. Develop a humble attitude toward the unknown

"I love the Latin root and meaning of the word humble. Humilis - hummus- of the ground, from the earth. Being humble is about being rooted to the earth. Grounded. To occupy my place in the world with reverence and gratitude. Being aware of my interdependent nature with all living beings and that this connection is what keeps me alive in body, mind and spirit. I recognize I need my grounding: as surroundings, as people, as space to embody and breathe my becoming."

Take a moment and go outside feel the earth under your bare feet. Breathe.

Can you feel the support?
What relation can you find between humility and trust?
How does feeling humble feel in your body?
How do you relate with the unknown?

To practice these Five Aspects of Spirit of Inquiry, once we find an specific belief, we question them with our IBC™️ methodology. We developed this truly powerful method after more than 15 years of supporting individuals, coaches, teams and organizations.